Seeing not so red

'No, no no, you won't need sat nav in Santorini, it's so tiny, just the idea of sat nav is laughable, that's how much you won't need it.'

Not only is there no sat nav availble here, there are no road signs either.

Recce day - first objective: find the Red Beach that looks so amazing in the tourist shots.
So we drove around the island a few times, got lost a lot, asked locals and deciphered their arm gestures and got lost some more.

And then we found it. RUBBISH. After a painful and awkward climb down, you get there and it's about the size of a single bed. And then the red sand? Not so red.

Plan B?